Blackout Continues? More Rules!
…This Picture is Animated :)
…ATTENTION! The same Secret message as last week is hidden in this Newspaper too! Click on he top right Crab: As of this moment, you are now a part of the EPF resistance. Report for duty in the underground HQ. Club Penguin will be free. –The Director of the EPF
Blackout Continues?
The weather forecast calls for increased darkness with a chance of freezing.
Club Penguin is saved! Herbert is defeated, and the EPF has risen from the ashes. MWAHAHA! Just kidding. All attempts to stop me have failed. The Blackout continues. It will NEVER end.
Oh yes. And I have a message for all you penguins still loyal to the EPF: Give up. Surrender. Forfeit. Throw in the towel. My crabs are scouring the island even now. Any agents they find are immediately imprisoned in my Freezer Pods. Make no mistake, I WILL get all of you. Each day I learn another agent’s identity. Each day, I add to my little icy collection. Soon I shall have the ultimate prize—the identity of your precious Director. And once I know who they are, the EPF is finished! So while I’m enjoying the sunshine, I urge you to accept the Blackout. I await your surrender.
More Rules!
By order of Herbert P. Bear, Illustrious Leader Supreme of Club Herbert, all future parties are now canceled. This includes: Adventure Parties, Medieval Parties, Music Jams, Fairs, April Fool’s Parties, Fashion Shows, Puffle Parties, Halloween and Holiday Parties. No Pirates, No Ninjas, No DJs, No Puffle Handlers, No Musicians, No Fishermen, No Explorers And ABSOLUTELY no EPF agents! Tour Guides must use Herbert-approved tour information. More rules next week!
Upcoming Events!
Coming in December Coins For Herbert All penguins will be required to donate coins to the very first annual Coins For Herbert.
Coming in January The Quiet Party Prepare for the quietest party ever!
Coming in January The Polar Bear Party Polar Bears are, quite frankly, extraordinary. And a celebration is long overdue.
The Blackout is set to continue at least until March, 2017. Operation Blackout CHEATS!
Find the collectible pin! Hidden now until Nov. 28 Heavy Weights Pin CHEATS :)
NO next pin hidden: PINS CANCELLED!
News Flash!
Emergency announcement: temperatures continue to plummet across the island. Snowfall has increased 359%, and conditions are approaching critical. Penguins and puffles are advised not leave their igloos without proper cold-weather gear.
Ask Herbert!
Hey Herbert! Do you know any good recipes? – Vegg E Fann
Take wheatgrass, spinach, rutabaga, egg plant, and soy beans. Eat them. Done.
Hey Herbert! Didn’t you help SAVE the island once? – Rooke E
No! And if I did (which I probably didn’t), it was likely a horrible accident!
Hey Herbert! Can you please give the sunlight back now? – Prit E Plees
No.
Hey Herbert! Aren’t there more practical ways to stay warm? – N Jinn Near
Yes, but none of them are nearly as fun. For me, that is.
Hey Herbert! Why do all the crabs do what you say? – Watts Upwitt Hat
Because they’re smarter than penguins.
Now that I’m warm, and the island is quiet, I’m perfectly happy here.
Hey Herbert, why don’t you just move somewhere warm?–Obb V Uss
I think a far better question would be— why don’t YOU? You penguins have plenty of boats and jetpacks and... boxes? I’m sure you could easily trek to a more suitable habitat. Come now, it could be a wonderful adventure for you all. Just think! There’s probably lots and lots of razzle dazzle penguintastic adventures out there just waiting for you. Let me be the first to wish you bon voyage! As for me, I’M not going anywhere. Running away from the cold is how I wound up HERE. So instead of repeating my mistake, I made my own paradise. Herbert P. Bear does not run. You penguins can feel free to do so.
Jokes!
Q. What kind of parties do penguins go to?
A. A snow ball! None! All parties are banned. MWAHAHA! – Louie018
Q. What Why do penguins sing on their birthday?
A. Freeze a jolly good fellow! All singing penguins will be frozen! No exceptions. – Yasmino12
Q. What gets shorter dimmer the longer it stands?
A. A candle! Your side of the island! – Jabberwocky
Q. What did Herbert P. Bear say to Klutzy the crab?
A. Let’s make the Electro Magnet 3000! I believe I said, “Let’s make a Solar Laser to heat my lair!" I suppose I won’t freeze you for this mistake. – Pinkytime67
Q. What did the rock penguin say to the ruler?
A. You rule! Herbert P. Bear Esquire—you rule! – Happy10605
Click, Click!C
lick ka-click? Clickety! Clickety ka-click? Clickety ka-click clickety click! – Klutzy
EPF Secrets Classified Secret Agent Identities: Jet Pack Guy!
To ensure those meddlesome EPF never interfere with my plans again, I’m going to expose ALL their secrets!
Welcome to another edition of EPF secrets! I have another secret agent identity to reveal. Have you ever seen THIS “guy" around the island:
Name: Jet Pack Guy
Real name: Guy
Rank: Tactical Lead
Strengths: Resourceful, tough, disciplined
Weaknesses: Very stern, teamwork needs improvement
Top Flight Speed: 680.59 Meters/second
Notes: Agent has memorized all EPF protocols. Can still recite the PSA handbook from memory
…See earlier Newspaper Club Herbert Times! Club Penguin Times issue 369
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